Saturday 6 August 2016

Lazarus Rising

What kind of texts do you usually write - short and crisp or long and meandering? If you're the latter kind, you'll get what I'm trying to say.

Do you have some friends - or maybe just one - to whom you keep on texting a constant commentary of your life? I do. Sometimes I realize that, really, someone who wasn't present at the moment a thing happened wouldn't really give a shit about such a detailed account of it. So, I try to restrain myself from writing really long texts. But there's this thing inside me that HAS to tell the story to someone. I just have to, because it was interesting to me. I like telling people what I think about things on a daily basis. So, what do I do?

Once, when I wrote a very long text to a friend, he straight up refused to read it. He said, "Kanika, I am not reading this dump you just took in my inbox." I said, "You could at least pretend to have read it. Now I'll have to find someone else to forward that text to."

He said, "Start a blog."

Those three simple words sent me down a guilt trip. He does not know that I already have a blog. Wait, sorry. That may have sounded like I was guilty about not telling him about my blog, but what I felt guilty about was the blog itself. Here I have it - this convenient platform to talk my heart out on. Even if nobody reads it, my need to express myself is satisfied in the belief that someday some poor sod is going to find my blog and read that damned post. So, here I have it. And yet, I've been ignoring it.

This blog has been dead for a long, long time. And why? I could give you twenty fairly reasonable excuses. College started. I was busy. All the usual bull. The best excuse is the one I gave myself. I didn't really want to write, and this blog is not something I should have to maintain as an obligation. It's a hobby, so I'll write when I feel like it. But that's untrue, and I can't keep lying to myself about it. I do want to write. Hence, the long texts.

Then why don't I? The actual reason for this is that writing a blog post includes editing it, proof reading it, making sure my writing style isn't degrading. All that jazz. I feel that I need to maintain a standard. And I'm too lazy to especially take out time and put in that kind of effort. So, I just let it go entirely. I am too lazy to edit, so let's not write at all. Preposterous!

Now, I've decided. It's time for me to resuscitate my blog. I will post something every week. It might be an aimless post, it might be mindless blabbering without head or tail like this one, it might even be unedited. But writing was the reason I started this blog in the first place. So, to hell with standards!

I. Will. Write.

It’s time for you to get back out there, my dear blog.

And hence was risen Lazarus.